Staying Motivated in the Gym....Part 1

Anyone can diet for 3 weeks, hit the gym real hard when the weather starts warming up. But it takes waaaay more than getting ready for the beach party to keep you in the gym, year round, get the long term results you want, and still have a life. I get asked all the time on tips for staying in shape bc I tend to be very consistent....and over the last year really went into overdrive (profile pic is 2 yrs old). The two building blocks are DISCIPLINE and COMMITMENT. Without those two, consider your gym membership a charitable donation. Wrote a post about it a few months ago....like to hear it, here it go.

DISCLAIMER!!! I am not a certified personal trainer. These are tips that I have gathered through trial and error (prolly the best teacher), much professional consultation and research.

You replied April 21, 2008 at 3:19pm

A lot of ppl online love posting pics from 2-3-4 years ago when they were at their pique but shy away from taking current pics. The first step for me that has been the most successful is start with the camera. That's a HUGE one. A lot of ppl hate taking pictures bc they are ashamed of what they're going to see.

CONFRONT IT!!! If you keep running from your problem areas you'll never do anything about it and they get worse. Embrace your (insert body part your not happy with) and acknowledge that you need to do fix it and that will motivate you to do something about it.

My strategies;
1: get a clear mental image of what you want your body to look like....LITERALLY! I bookmark pages in mens health and watched "300" 4 times a week to get me started. You may laugh but when you feel like skipping out on the gym, that mental image will motivate you not to.
2: Set realistic goals. If you're skinny as hell, you're not going to have beyonce hips (someone actually told me that as her goal). You wont lose 30 pounds in a month unless your rich, unemployed and or have some terminal illness. BABY STEPS! On an extreme diet and work out plan, you can expect to lose or gain 1-3 lbs a week, and let me re-iterate EXTREME. Meaning you monitor everything you eat, and excercise 3-5 times a week.
3: Set a goal to underachieve. No matter what goals you have, most ppl wont stick to a plan unless its accessible and convenient. Personally I started out with 30 mins in the gym, 3x a week. Then as you develop the habit, push yourself harder. When picking a gym, doesn't matter if it has all the bells and whistles, if it's not on your way to and from work or 10 minutes from your home, the average person is not going to go. I should add that. Don't be average!
4: THROW OUT THE SCALE! Get some measuring tape. Scales are deceitful bc muscle weighs more than fat. A woman who weighs 160 with muscle tone will look a lot slimmer than a woman at 160 with higher fat %. Thats why ppl work out for weeks, see no difference in the scale, get discouraged and quit. Instead, measure your waist, legs and arms and keep a log of your growth or loss.
5: Take pictures. Since you see yourself all day everyday, you wont notice the result. I never notice any difference but when I see friends after 1,2,3 months ppl tell me I got bigger. Then i go back to photos from 3,2, 1 month ago and i can see the difference. Seeing results builds motivations, motivation makes you work harder, which causes more results. WARNING!! Do not take any photos that may come back to haunt you.
6:the biggest results happen in the kitchen, not the gym. Diets are the devil, you need to rethink and transform you eating and lifestyle habits. Consult a nutritionist, or even better, invest in a personal trainer. If not for the training at least on the nutrition. Once you learn that you can eat right and still enjoy all your favorite foods, your body will transform.
7: most important, ONLY TAKE ADVICE ONLY FROM PPL WHO ARE QUALIFIED AND COMPETENT TO GIVE IT!!! Diets are the devil and i see entirely too many ppl passing on bad advice and bad diet tips to other ppl. No two ppl are made the same and just bc you ate nothing but celery, tree bark, vinegar and lemon for 4 weeks, doesn't mean it will work for everyone else.

Finding what works for you is probably the best advice by far. Not everyone is gym pounder. I find the ppl with the best physiques are dancers and athletes. They tend to have firm cores with 6-8 packsand they don't do a single crunch. Its all about the activity. I'd recommend running, dance classes, swimming and cycling for ppl who don't necessarily like hard weights. But then again, wouldn't this be a wonderful utopic world if results and everything in the universe we wanted catered to what we liked and didn't like?

Side note: It's actually way more effective to spend 10-20 minutes doing light free weight training than it is to spend hours on cardio machines (elyptical machine is the devil). I don't like weights, i just like the results they give me.

I really didn't intend to make this that long but hopefully someone who's really serious about making some changes will find some value in it. I'm no expert, I just consult with quite a few. For the last 6 months I've maintained less than 10% body fat and in the last 3 months added 90lbs to my bench and 80 to my squats. I did nothing special, just consistency, never missed a week and kept my mind on the image of how i want myself to look and feel.

To be continued.... Stay tuned for.................Staying Motivated in the Gym.......Part 2

KUMBAYAA!! WHAT TOOK SO LONG?

Looks like I been blogging all over the world, everywhere and on everysite........... EXCEPT MIIIIIIINE!!! GASP!!!!

NEXT!

I think ppl in general are just confused and don't really know what they want. Everyone has preferences and prejudices and don't know how to draw a line between the two. ( I talk about this with my female friends all the time).
We have so many double standards. Girls get mad when guys say they don't like fat girls, but would you date a man thats shorter than you??????

Some women will, but to all the women who just curled up thier lip by just reading that, EXACTLY. Point taken?
There's nothing wrong with big guys or big girls. Some people dont like to date ppl who are lightskinned, darkskinned, fat, skinny, tall, short, nappy, permed, stink, vegetarian, capricorn or a million other combinations. The problem is that we take it too personal. I know a guy who only likes girls who are cute, thick, short, darkskinned with large breast (DD minimum). So no matter how beautiful you are, if you're not in that mold, he wouldn't be attracted to ya. Does that mean something is wrong with you? 'Course not!

If a person doesn't like big girls, that has nothing to do with you and everything to do with the other person. If you feel that you need a change yourself, then go for it, but don't try to change for someone or worse try to change someone else. NEXT!! Move on and find the person thats right for you. That wants you bc of who you are.

I'm sorry but I'm not one of those hunters, I'm too grown to chase. If you wanna run I'll be the first to let you go. I dont think ppl should be trying to sell yourself to someone when theres always someone out there thats dying to be with you.

We need to stop trying to force feed beef to a vegetarian when there are plenty of steak lovers to go around, if you step outside the tunnel vision of what you "think" you want.

NEXT! -Words to live by

Why are women bigger cheaters than men?

Now that I got your attention, this is my devil’s advocate response to "why do guys always cheat?" (Fuel for the flames)

I actually wrote this in word and it came up to 2 pages, so I’ll sum it up in a paragraph and you can choose to read the rest at your leisure.

I believe, if not all, 90-95% of women cheat. I believe most single women (and some in relationships) have at least 4 men in her life:
1. The “Buddy”
2. The “Brain”
3. The “Sugar Daddy”
4. "TNT"
You can read or skip through the 4 types (and there's more, I'm just generalizing)
the real bread and butter is at the bottom under the page break, but I highly reccommend learning the 4 types. DUDES ESPECIALLY! So you can spot the signs and avoid falling into some of these traps.

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1. The "buddy" - This is your sensitive/easy-going/good listening/always there to talk to/ shoulder to cry on/ Mr. Nice guy. You talk all the time, even go out, eat, chill, maybe even catch a movie. He cooks for you, his momma loves you. BUT you know damn well he has absolutely no shot in hell getting anything from you i.e. relationship, sex. The sad part is most times the guy likes, or worse, loves you. The cruel thing is, you probably know this. Even more f’d up is you probably talk to him in gross detail of your romantic/sexual escapades and how much your feeling someone else. No matter how hard he tries or how close he thinks he is, he will remain in the “friend zone” forever. FELLAS, BE WARE AND OPEN YOUR EYES IF YOU’RE IN THE FRIEND ZONE! MOVE ON bc you’re wasting your valuable time. – trust me, I’ve been there.

2. The “Intellect” AKA “The Brain”, “Mr. Sophisticated” – Women bore VERY easily and thus need mental stimulation as well. The buddy may sometimes be the same dude (women like to consolidate their shopping as much as possible, that’s why they sell accessories at shoe stores) so beware of double duty fellas. This is the guy who’s in school, graduated, in grad school, teaches at a university, won the apprentice or has an exciting job while your man works at BestBuy (no offense to anyone who works at bestbuy). You discuss everything from politics to globalization, to the nasdaq to the deregulation of telecom to Greys Anatomy, Heroes and 24. He listens to your poetry when your man and family could care less bc he writes poetry, listens to Smetna, Bach and Jay-Z. In this day and age with IM, facebook and text messaging, you probably even talk to him while your man is sitting right there next to you. His setback: you already have a man or either he’s not that attractive, too old, too young, too short, skinny, fat, (insert adjective here). Or maybe you did experiment with him sexually but he cant kiss, was wack or ill-equipped so you figured, you better off where you are. Same applies to #1.

3. “The Sugar Daddy” – Not all women will experience this luxury, but if you have, I say reap it! This is a dude who takes care of you financially and may not always want something in return (but let’s be real, most do). I never been one, I don’t understand this phenomena but hey, I’m not signing up for that course. If you need anything, he got you from food, to shoes, to rent and everything in between. Typically; an older dude more accomplished, more mature, secure with a “good job” (personally don’t believe the words good and job go together but that’s another conversation) has his own place, car and is financially stable or well off. Most times, some dumby you're beating in the head (the wrong one that is). Sad thing is, sometimes this dude has a girl. Evil thing is sometimes he has a wife and family but chooses to find happiness in pouring money into some young girl to see her happy. You may not have had your rent paid but a few dinners, movies and gifts qualify. His set back: See #2

4. The last category has several names. I’ll refer to him as “TNT.” Usually, when I find a girl in a destructive, abusive, imbalance relationship and I ask why are they trying so hard to make this work (remember, I used to be a 1 and a 2 and 4 so I'm speaking first hand) it usually boils down to two things: The Tongue or the Tool and God forbid the dude has both – TNT is dangerous and women are attracted somewhat to that dangerous element. The sad thing, women will put up with verbal, emotional even physical abuse that much longer with a TNT dude. The evil thing about it, TNT dudes know this and tend to be assholes, arrogant and could care less. WHY IS THAT? It is much harder for women to find good sex and head than guys. A guy can make himself cum in 3 minutes or less. No matter how bad the sex is, it always has a happy ending. Most women have had more wack sex than good and I know women from their mid 20’s to early 30’s who have never climaxed (which is partially the woman’s fault for not knowing her own body but that’s another conversation). So when a woman finds good TNT (or one of the two) she will hold on to that bronco for dear life. He could have no job, 3 baby mommas, a rapsheet a mile long, never take her out anywhere or spend one cent, drop out the 3rd grade and slap her momma. And the girls response is “What did you do momma!!?” His setback, he’s an asshole, broke, unstable dangerous or all of #2

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If you read all of my brain fart, here’s the real bread and butter;

That breaks down to at least 4 guys in her life and she's cheating on all of them. She's satisfies her emotions, her mind, her finance and body, but not necessarily with the same person. If you're in a commitment but satisfy your needs elsewhere, is that not cheating?

Women always say guys cheat, and by cheat we mean sex right? “All they want is sex.” DUH!! Did you just figure this out? Were you born this size? I’m in no way advocating cheating, but I love to argue (it pisses my girl off like you wouldn’t believe).
If it’s wrong for guys to have sex with other women while their in a relationship, is it okay for a woman to go out with, go to dinner with, confide with, have someone spend $$ on her, sleep in the same bed as, “snuggle/spoon,” kiss, get head or all other things outside of sex with another man?

Bottom line, ppl cheat bc something is lacking. Whether its physical, emotional or mental are you doing your best to keep your mate happy? But then some people are fucked up and just have to fuck around so get to know the person before you start having sex and saying "I love you." IF SOMEONE COULD CHEAT ON HALLE BERRY, then no one is safe lol...

Fischer Price - My First Blog/Disclaimer

I think a lot. Stupid statement of the day.
So after 3 years, I finally decides to make one of these things after I spent like an hour and a half reading some of my friends thoughts

some of my comments were long enough to be blogs on thier own....hmmmmmmmm..?

Im using this bc I've been dying to write and i never discipline myself to.
Its been 7 months since i've been in front of a classroom
I never realized how much my students were a driving force in my creativity.
I had to create and be creative to lead by example.

Now, with no teachers, with no students, with no classroom,
where does one find the motiviation?
the inspiration?
the spark?

Disclaimer:
when I type i tend to think at the speed of wind
and in doing so I have very little regard for grammar,
tenses,
cases
and other laws that govern this bastard language that is english.
on top of that I refuse to use spell check.
have you ever tried to chase the wind?
ever tried catching it?
tough aint it

Like my good friend rnb says "if you can correct, then you understand me."

Sorry if that offends anyone but what little respect i've had for the english language i lost it after "bootylicious" was entered into the dictionary (don't believe me? http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/bootylicious )