RIM's response to the Iphone Droid Circus [From The BlackBerry Chronicles]

Although blackberry is still the number one selling smart phone in America, according to USA Today, sales fell to 41% in the first quarter as opposed 55% last yr. SOOOOOOOOO, what's RIM's response?

The BlackBerry Torch 9800

This is by no means an EVO, Droid, or Iphone killer, but I can't lie.............my love muscle kinda tingled JUST a liiiiiiiiittle bit when I saw and read about it. I'm still reading up on the tech specs which initially seem not AS competitive as the major big guns out there, but I been a fan of BB functionality since the track was a scroll wheel on the right side and everything was either left, right, up down so this is still a huge innovation of previous models. For example, a 5 mp camera is not as impressive when the you have Iphones and Evo that have HD screens and HD camera's. I must say the lack of HD quality is a bit disappointing. Still kinda anxious to see how this new BB 6 operating system works, and the boost in memory, long battery life, improved browser and retained keyboard and trackpad is pretty sweet. The funny thing to me is that several yrs ago I was at a crossroad and I chose BB over a touchscreen and I always wished I could combine the two. It's like a touch screen phone and a BlackBerry had a baby..........and it sliiiiiiiides.

It's hands down the illest Blackberry to date (I just hope its true touch and not push-touch like the Storm - wasn't a fan of that phone - RIM's mistake as far as I'm concern) and IMO, one of the greatest concepts in cellphone to date. Set to release on AT&T first (wish you had that unlimited plan now huh?) its supposed to release August 12th, just in time for my birthday. I knew there had to be a reason why I been draggin my foot on buying a new phone and have been out of contract for 2 yrs now. I anticipate the Iclone and Droid Does'ers and their needless hate just brewing as we speak. AAAAAAAAHHHHH go charge up your battery!

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COD is CRACK!!! [From the Blackberry Chronicles]

Does COD, WAW (not to be mistaken with WOW) or MW2 ring a bell to you?

First sign that a videogame has reached epidemic proportions: women who don't play videogames know the acronym. My high school homie and many other women have confessed that this game has ruined her sex life. The menace we speak of, of course, is the 6th "Call of Duty" game: "Modern Warfare 2." And I confess, I would blog like everyday were it not for that game...........and Super Street Fighter 4

What man of proper testosterone levels does not want to strap on an m-16 equipped with silencer and red dot, frag, flash grenades, stealth and enemy radar jammer and run a Rambo/Commando on some charlies and tangos? Its like G.I. Joe....except the bullets actually hit ppl. Forget the fact that we are glorifying violence, warfare combat, and the blatant/latent pro-military propaganda, DA SHIT IS FUN SUN!!!

Why to men love this so? All men have some pent up frustration and or animosity that a lavishly successful career, good credit score, a healthy sexlife and/or rabid masturbation just won't alleviate. That's why men do surface level-seemingly stupid shit like hunt, extreme sports, unprotected sex, skydive, customize cars, box and date crazy chicks. Why? Bc society has set up so many social barriers that we cannot permeate. Its socially unacceptable to be violent despite our natual carnal instinct. How often have we seen we seen infants playing and one "Stewie" of a child crack-smacks the pituitaries out of a next child for touching his/her precious toys. Yet we vilify the poor tyrant-to-be as if foreign ppl are supposed to touch your stuff unwarranted (then u wonder why lil Jenny has boys sneaking out ur window while ur at work).

Sidenote: As I'm giving this a final glance over, I can't help but think this scenario sounds familiar........AH YES! We called it the Gulf War. Learn your history!

Sidernote: Ghost is one of the coolest fictional military characters since Snake Eyes and Mister T!

Its socially unacceptable and we frown upon hitting or enacting violence on women, children, old ppl, ppl from Jersey, Ben Afflack, students, puppies, bosses, co-workers, ex's, Redsox or Knicks fans - who coincidentally tend to be some of the most annoying ppl who arguably deserve to be hit the most! Not saying I condone viiolence but sit here and tell me you haven't fathomed pulverizing at least three of these types if not all, then cast your stones. So where does all this frustration go? Nothing vents frustration like calling in an air strike with an Apache chopper gunner attack helicopter or "the angel of death" Lockheed ac-130.

So next time you see your man playing some mw2 or any other game, don't feel jealous. He is simply making deposits into his "I'm not going to whip her monkey ass" account. And for that, you should celebrate having a good man. Get yourself involved. Test his focus.....challenge him and see if he can maintain a positive KD (kill/death ratio where you have more kills than deaths) while his penis is in your mouth. Some of yall are grossed out, but most dudes will go ring shopping for that or at least keep that in mind next time he's tempted to cheat.

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Dont Fall for The AT&T Okie Doke!! [From the Blackberry Chronicles]

I'm always amazed how ape-shit ppl go over new Apple products. You couldn't even load the att website when the new iphone was announced bc all the iphone feens crashed the sight. Att is hilarious. They realized that they are utterly incapable of keeping up with the massive demands caused by the Iphone, so in an attempt fix it, their solution is..............stop using the network so much or we'll nickel and dime you out. But since they cant exactly cut your service against your will, they had to come up with a more alluring, seductive way to do pull this off.

If I believed in the market, I would have invested heavily in att about a month ago when they announced that they were no longer offering unlimited data to new users and revealed the new tiered data structure. Smart users will save a lot of money, but ppl who use their phone ignorantly will get raped. Once I get my new phone that will do all the things I currently don't do, the data calculator estimated me at 4.45 gigs a month. Att's "high end" plan is 2gs and $10 for every 1g over you go. Couple that with them raising the early termination fees on smartphones, (therefore, if you jumped ship just for the Iphone and are dissatisfied with terrible service, you're trapped or have to part ways with a kidney to go back to your old provider) att stands to make a killing.

Remember at one point, phone companies discontinued the unlimited nights and weekends (unless you already had it) bc of usage congestion and only offered 1000 nights and weekends. Remember when long distance wasn't included in your anytime minutes? Calling your neighboring state...and in some cases town, was an additional charge.

Sidenote: My first ever cellphone plan was 200 anytime minutes, long distance not included, unlimited nights and weekends, and I had it for a year before I ever went over (relationships are costly). My first txt msg plan was 200 msg... I average 1200-1700 txt msgs a month now. Can we agree that time and habits change?

Idunno about yall, but I would hold on to a grandfathered unlimited data plan (which they are discontinuing). At first glance, a $15 blackberry plan looks very enticing, but who knows what the internet will look like in 1-3 yrs. Look out for a few things here and on the horizon that will forever alter the next generation of cellphones. Here are a few reasons why you should hold onto your unlimited plan.

Video Calling: Although its currently choppy at best, if you can even connect a call, this is going to be the next mega-craze for smartphone usage. The Evo, Iphone 4 and a small handful others are a few that can video chat now. The quality is about as poor as pre-T1 speed webcam chat but will only get better. Soon, it will be as common as having a camera on your phone. You can't even find a phone today without a camera (they even have flashes that rival your actual camera). I would have preferred companies spent more R&D and fine tuned the concept first, but I credit these folks who pushed to be the first.

Tethering: It's bad enough that att charges you additional fees to do this, while other providers don't but with the tethering option, coupled with an unlimited data plan, you could make a wireless hotspot right at home without a cable or dsl internet plan. You can even use it anywhere with your laptop like an air card. You would definitely need an unlimited plan for this, otherwise whats the point? You think cell phone internet eats a lot of data imagine your computer internet usage? It transfers information to and from your computer even when you're not doing anything.

Video Texting: Att has a phone called "The Shine" and there are a few others that can already insert video into a txt message. Not a hyperlink, not an attachment. Yes. The actual video as streamline as those messages with pictures in it. After thinking "how fricken cool is that?" my inner nerd (shut up Denisha! He's inner I say!) couldn't help but think "that is going to consume a lot of data. Email can't even do that yet w/o youtube.

Wifi: If your wondering why you walk around with 2 spare batteries and bring your charger EVERYWHERE, its bc you probably have your WAP or wifi set to "on". Wifi is much faster than 3G (since its using a different network than what you use for voice) and can handle greater data transfers. This is perfect if you're trying to save $$ bc you can opt out of a data plan and just pick up a reliable wifi signal just like you do with your laptop. So what's the Achilles heal here? See first statement: since its doing more work and constantly checking for more reliable networks, its exorbitantly taxing on battery life, rendering it an unattractive option. As networks get faster and faster, unless companies do something to improve power management, more and more ppl will rely more on their data plans.

Blackberry Messenger: Yall know by now that if bbm was a woman, I'd massage her feet daily. I'm seriously about to get rid of or lower my txt msg plan (I haven't bc I had a conversation similar to this with myself) bc everyone I talk to most is on bbm. You can already have group chats, conference chatting, file sharing, send images, files and even record voice notes back and forth (how's that for a spin on free international conversations; feel free to steal that; you're welcome) its only a matter of time before video chatting is an option.

Multi Media Messages: Show of hands, how many ppl have more than 3 megapixels on their phone cam? Ok, now how many ppl have a phone cam that rivals most digital camera's? I remember when 3.0mp came out in the art/graphics/photography world, that was the death of "point and click" cameras and the 5.0+ was the nail in the coffin for film (outside of industry preference). Now they are making 5-10mp HD cameras on cell phones. Better quality = larger files = more data required to send those picture msg we send so frequently, a la "hey I bought some bomb ass new shoes - CLICK:::SNAP:::SEND- see!!??" You may not exceed 2gigs a month NOW, but 2 phones down the line you may. Which leads me to my last point:

Most users are oblivious of their data usage: Can anyone quantify the txt equivalent of 20 bytes of data?.......... The Final Jeopardy answer, "how are you?" I know this bc I had extensive conversations when trying to figure out an international data plan. Images and attached files are easy bc they tell you the file size but how much data is a 2 minute streaming video, Facebook page or even this blog? Plus these newer phones can do more like view flash, allowing you to watch hulu or netflix on your phone.

Sidenote: wifi and netflix kills my laptop battery life what pillage and desecration will it do to my poor wee lil cell phone battery?

Rumor has it that other carriers are looking to follow suite with the tiered data pricing. If history repeats itself, they may eventually bring back the unlimited plans as data/network supply catches up to consumption demands.....but what if we don't. Do we as consumers need to usher into a new era of limits, restriction, become more cognizant (thanks lady in red) and responsible and considerate about our data ussage?.............................................................MAAAAAAAAAAN, [UGHFFF] DAT!!! As much as we're over charged?!! Shooooot, I'll take a picture of my hand giving a middle finger, attach a voicenote of me singing "lalala," type "how are you" 100 times, and bbm that bitch to Mars if I damn well please!

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Know your strengths, OWN your weaknesses

[From the Blackberry Chronicles]

Sidenote: Everyone at some point should do a SWOT analysis- strengths, weaknesses, obstacles, threats. Tough to do on yourself so you may need some third party help.

Sidernote: FYI, there are about 30 blogs written on my phone at any given time that with a 10 minute polish are ready to be posted. So if I ever meander for too long, just shoot me a hoot and I'll supply. Thanks Malissa........wait! What the hell did I just do?!!

I hear far too often from the feminine species:
"I need a booty!"
"I wanna be taller!"
"I wanna be shorter!"
"I need more breast!"
"I need to lose my gut....even tho I'm doing nothing about it and rrchitect clearly outlined everything I need to do to do that!"
And the list goes on for days. I can't blackball the ladies bc everywhere you look there are "performance enhancers, male enhancer" daggering medication for men so clearly the demand is there as well. We just don't complain, we find solutions (ooooooooh SNAP!).

Sidenote: That must be the mf'ing running man theme song!

Here's the funniest part. I almost never hear this from my heftier, homely, moderate and even flat out unattractive female friends. Its always, and I mean ALWAYS from hot, attractive, educated, successful got it going on, five star, bad chick women. What the hell!? Its bad enough you got a booty that can double as a night stand and own your own business. Its bad enough you got more degrees than a thermometer and enough breast to nurse a litter of pot belly pigs and or small impoverished towns. Its bad enough you have a vogue worthy face, and graduated from Oxford Summa, Cum Laude with a 12% bmi. NO!! You wanna monopolize ALL of the good traits. What kinda greedy ass, Sam Catchem, "gotta-catch-em-all" Pokemon-ass women are yall? Is this the same over-achiever instinct that propagates some self imposed sense of entitlement?

We truly need to spend less time focusing on what we don't have and concentrate more time and energy on what we do have.

Sidenote: Woah! Had to catch myself there. I could have easily slipped down that slope of making this about relationships but I'll let yall connect those dots yourself......la lalala. If not, see "NEXT!"

Ever stop for a second to think, maybe, just maybe there is some higher metaphysical reason why you DON'T have said trait? What kind of person would you have been if you had all these? Would being "prettier, sexier" make you an uglier person? Would you be happier with what you THINK you want, at the cost of who you are today? Perhaps the absence of certain elements fueled your drive, direction and most important, character? For a happier day, rather than curse your curses, bless your blessings. The lord has his own system of checks and balances.


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Psa stop using headsets if not visible!

[From the Blackberry Chronicles]

Grandpa Rant # 358-J
You know what grinds my gears? I don't understand. Cell phones are getting smaller n smaller (yet they manage to squeeze a camera and mp3 player in all of em) so why are we gettin lazier and lazier? We had no problem with the coiled kitchen phone (stretching it to the bathroom for privacy), holding it between our shoulder and neck.

Sidenote: were you ever mid conversation and the phone sliped out and went flying across the room?....... Ok I'm really dating myself now. Some readers are all like "when did phones have cords?" Don't get me started on rotary phones.

We had no problem with holding up those Zack Morris satellite phones that look like you're calling in a military air strike. However, our weak feeble hands cannot sustain the 0.4 lbs phone we now own, so we need head sets.

Sidenote: 3.5 yrs ago I bought my mom a phone and it was absolutely impossible to find a phone without a camera. Soon it will be impossible to find a non qwerty phone with web browser, data, mp3 and souljah boy ringtones.

Sidernote: Am I the only one that thinks the bluetooth is not a fashion accessory and undergoes extreme scratch-headedness whenever seeing one when no call is underway?

Yes I'm venting for no reason bc I'm sick of thinking ppl are talking to me or just crazy and talking to themselves. Especially if they have long hair that covers the headset. I'm not talking about driving or course, where its mandated in most areas, I mean regular willy nilly having a convo with you but has his headset on Harry Nelson. Hands-free headsets were designed to.....well.....free your hands, to do other things. If you're using your free hand.......... to hold the phone...well that's kinda counter intuitive now, aint it?

This has been brought to u by "Random Hate Thursdays," and of course loyal support and contributions by "Viewers Like You!"

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Why kids today are so DUMB!! Theory 6 [From theThe Blackberry Chronicles]

Previously in My $0.02................... Why kids today are so DUMB!! Theory 1

Followed by.................................Why kids today are so DUMB!! Theory 2

Then..................................Why kids today are so DUMB!! Theory 3

and............................................Why kids today are so DUMB!! Theory 4
And last time .......................Why kids today are so DUMB!! Theory 5


One of my biggest pet peeves is SPOILERS, so without giving one, everyone needs to see the movie "Brothers" with Tobey Maguire and Natalie Portman to truly understand the frustration and annoyance I experienced. See the climax of the story, then re-read this blog. If you have seen the movie....... keep in mind the most disobedient and unruly act in the history of children on film. What would provoke ppl to act the fool, wilding out in public, carrying and having fits.........what causes all of this?

Theory #6: No beatings!

At some point in time we decided that its inhumane to whoop our kids asses in school (despite the fact that every other country that does it kicks our butt in education) then it trickled into the households. My brothers and I grew up with beatings (we called it "licks) like we grew up on milk. We were never the type to act up in public, throw a temper tantrum rolling on the floor kicking and screaming. We got our asses kicked for far lesser infractions and my parents were never the type to beat in public. Could you imagine the thrashing that would have ensued when we got home if we pulled that tomfoolery?

Children, correction, babies do not understand English! Or any other verbal language you raise your kids around. They read, understand and interpret feelings. Socket example: [theses are little esoteric notes I leave myself in shorthand to remind me to add content....why am I leaving this? Why am I explaining this???] If you see an infant heading towards a fork....red flag.........the child has it....red light are flashing..........if the child with the fork is near a socket....the alarms are blazing by now, do you talk to the child, or do you slap the fork out of its flapping hand? Ppl sometimes respond best to action. This applies well into the early 20's with most ppl. Cognition isn't necessarily indicative of understanding.

I remember reading about a child who misunderstood what was said at school and called child services bc their parent punished them. What kid in my generation would have had the cajones to do that? First of all, you pick up a phone during a beating in my house you won't make it to the second "1" and you just inherited a new pummeling device once the phone was snatched out your hand. Secondly, how many of us heard the threat that if we successfully dialed, there would be nothing left for 911 to save once they got here? Third, we live in the hood. 911 aint coming no time soon. The folks could get in 3 rounds and intermissions by the time they arrived on the scene. The cost/benefit analysis was heavily imbalanced.

Now you have all these child disorders that keep psychiatrists gainfully employed, pharmaceuticals companies profitable and grad school/phd students funded. I have self diagnosed myself with ADD. A.D.D. = As I speak, I am on a train, mentally packing for my trip tomorrow, listening to some dance tracks and choreographing routines in my head. And working on ANOTHER reason why kids are so blasted dumb bc they're interrelated....but I digress.

If I had homework and I couldn't focus here are some surefire cures to ADD:

• Finish your homework or imma whoop that ass!
• - or I'll throw away all your toys!
• - or I'll throw away all your comic books!
• - or no TV, video games for you! [Sidenote: You remember when being sent to your room was a form of punishment? With my brothers and my creative asses, my parents punished us by making us come out of our rooms.....and watch the news.....and Jeapordy....and read]
  
• Pass this test or you'll fail
• Pass this class or you'll lose your scholarship!
• Do well in this class or you'll be kicked out of school!
• Finish this project or you're fired!
• Make this money or you'll lose you're house!
• Get this calculation right or ppl will die!

You think time and all these circumstances care what your conditions are?

So for the love of God, whoop yo kids monkey ass ( and their asses sure are monkey!) bc they need to understand consequence, causality and penalties. You think I'm evil? Send your kids into the world with no regards for respect and limitations..............then you wonder why yo lazy ass roommates don't wash dishes for days on end! Got yo place smelling like frog placenta.....no? No good? Too much?

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Why You're Still Single - Ladies I

PROLIGUE <----(Please read before continuing)
1 - Choice.
As "the Architect" from the Matrix movies (no relation, I actually am an architect and RRC are my actual initials.........wow the assonance on that one..say that sentence outloud) appropriately stated: "the problem is choice." Many women have a harem of men at their will and bend, but CHOOSE not to embrace any of them. Partially bc of the other person (many specific reasons we will eventually get to), but also bc they aren't ready for the slow down and obligations that come with a relationship. Don't believe the hype, women have commitment issues too especially a busy woman with a lot going on in her life. It's a huge change to suddenly be accountable to and considerate of another person and lets be honest, women have issues with that just as men do. The reason I needed to start here was to make sure that we're clear, when we're crying and complaining, that many ppl are here, primarily by choice.

14 – You bottlenecked yourself by statistics.

If we haven't heard it eleventy-seventy times. What are the most common ones?

-Black women outnumber black men 12-1

-50% of marriages end in divorce

-The number of black women unmarried over 30 is double that of white women

But there are a few significant "soundbytes" that narrow the playing field that I'd like to touch on:

"% of men without a High School/ College diploma." I can understand why, but lets play devil's advocate here: Are you a university? Does this mean that there is no hope for redemption because I dropped out of high school or had responsibilities and financially couldn't go to college? Why are we wasting our time talking about careers and college!!? If we start going to middle and high schools right now and tell them no one will wanna date, marry or have sex with you without your diploma, we would have 90-99% graduation rates. I'll get started on the proposal. Shoot, Chris Rock dropped out of high school, imagine if his wife had that attitude about his millionare ass?

"% of men who have been incarcerated." DA: If you're job is an equal opportunity employer, why aren't you? Similar point, does that discqualify any one whose been encarcerated? There are ppl who change not to mention that many ppl are in prison or jail for non-violent offenses or have no prior criminal history. Martha Stewart and Michael Vick have jail records.

"% of men who are gay." Well there are gay women as well, so rest assure, the competition is thinning out too. Speaking of competition, there are factors that limit the types of women men look for also, so you don't neccessarily have to worry about the other 11 females. Just focus on the one.

"% of single men who already have children." DA: As with everything else, you're eliminating a lot of high quality potential before you've even gotten into physical or personality attributes. The older, you get, the more prevalent this becomes so at some point you have to decide are you going to let a good man go bc he has a child? Hopefully not too late, which spring boards to our last point of the day:

18 – Tunnel Vision: You woke up too late

There's a chapter in the book "He's just not into you" titled "Don't waste the pretty" and unfortunately I think many misinterpretted that and inadvertedly, wasted the pretty. Everyone has their "list" of things they are looking for in a mate. The main reason why you find attractive single people is because of their standards. There are the four leaf clover who are so pretty and humble but no one approaches them, but thats not the normative scenario. Now nothing is wrong with standards, but as you get older, you start to realize that a lot of your standards are superficial. Especially the specific ones. "He has to be 6'-4" and above....Are you a ride? What sport do you coach or do you anticipate storing things in high cubbards? Not only are your pre-requisites limiting, you've now illiminated more than half of your acceptable pool. My lil sis used to specify 6"-4"+ with slim athletic build, until one day I challenged her to keep a log of how many of those she actually saw per day for a week. But when you had "the pretty" on your side, your body was where some of you are trying to get back to now, you had the discretionary power to pick and choose as you saw fit. So you dated a little here, dismissed a little here, yada yada yada... Maybe it wasn't preference, but you told yourself you had to focus on your school/career/life and wrote someone off (that you could have made time for if you decided to) before they even had a chance.

Here's something to ponder when you're alone asking yourself "why?" Whether it was height, education, income, hair, complexion, whatever, how many wonderful men slipped right through your reach bc you didn't know how to spot them out?

A good man is like a stealth bomber. The irony of the stealth bomber is that it's the farthest thing from discrete. It's a loud, huge, BLACK aircraft...very discrete in the day time. However, most radar systems are completely blind to it. If you were in a tower, and used your eyes, you'd spot it a mile away, but alas, you were looking into the lens of the wrong device. Great, now you've been tactically nuked. NICE!!!

To be continued....