[....oh I get it... cus he got beat up n bruised...]
How sad. Our President/Commander in chief outlines his strategies for military action in Iraq and Afghanistan with detailed number of troops, dollar amounts and exact dates. You would think that that would be the top story of the day. Right? No? No good?
WRONG!!!!!
Christmas came early this year for the media. They are having a field day with this Tiger Woods debacle. [Controversial statement of the day] The American media loves nothing more than bringing down a prominent black person from glory........YEAH I SAID IT!!
"AAW fiddle sticks RrChitect! How can you say such treachery!?" I know, I know little Timmy. The truth is sometimes inconvenient (shout outs to "film-making-cant-win-an-election-ass" Al Gore) and hard to swallow, but lets take a historic audit. [Just to name a few, bc the actual list would be a few pages long:
Paul Robeson
Martin Luther King
Sidenote: King died years after his "I have a dream speech" yet you can't find (rather, would be hard pressed to find) any of his speeches after that one. Look them up and you'll see why....that's your homework assignment for the day.
Muhammad Ali
Mike Tyson
Micheal Jackson
O.J. Simpson
Micheal Jordan
Kobe Bryant
Barry Bonds
Sidenote: I love the fact that the Crucible-like witch hunt for Bonds actually lead to a downfall of epic, Titanic proportions which taints almost every record, all star and hall of famer of the last 10 yrs.
And now added to the list, one of the most powerful black celebrities (we're talking Oprah and Obama star power)....Tiger Woods. Take black off of that sentence bc Tiger is actually one of, if not the, wealthiest athletes in the world.
Much like the whole Chris/Rihanna fiasco, I'm going to reserve in-depth commentary until I have all the facts. Sorry, but I think its a sad zeitgeist when TMZ and US magazine are respected and credible sources of news....and the actual news stations are quoting them. Oh the dilapidation of journalism. So far, the buzz is that his wife found out he's been cheating and apparently did one of these....albeit speculation.....
....And allegedly he crashed the jeep, damaging his car, a fire hydrant and causing $200 in damage to tree.
Sidenote: Perhaps Tiger should have taken classes from the "Chris Brown Defensive Driving Institute." [Eff'd up comment of the day] As messed up as it was, the part of the whole story that fascinates me to this day is as bad as CB beat Rihana.............he did it while driving... on a highway and through local traffic.........in one of those foreign European sports cars.........WHICH IS A MANUAL CAR!! So you mean to tell me he was driving with one hand, and with just one other hand free, defending himself AND whipping the left pituitaries out of Rihana WHILE shifting gears??!! It's not right but its FASCINATING!! I bet you Chris Brown wouldn't have crashed that jeep.
Sidernote: "$200 in damage to a TREE??!?!" Seriously!?!? DUDE!! I have never heard of anyone crashing into a tree and getting charged for the tree. Have any of you? Please enlighten me. They will milk whatever they can out of his rich behind.
Will Tiger recover his image...only time will tell. He shattered many barriers in a sport that 100 years ago.........50 years ago, he wouldn't even be allowed to step foot in if he wasn't a servant. I wouldn't be surprised if there were a few powerful ppl pissed at him. Perhaps its time we stop putting athletes and celebrities on pedestals and accepting that they are human beings, and not our pillars and beacons of morality. [MESSAGE!!!]Poor poor Tiger. I'm sure this will get way more scrutiny than McGreevy, Spitzer, or that dumbass South Carolina Governor who had an affair in Brazil, and thought FATHERS DAY would be the most discrete weekend to disappear for a rendevue.
D.N.O = Dudes Night Out..........more from the crackberry chronicles....
"OOOOH! My first mistake was I wanted too much time. I had to have em morning noon and night If I would have know then the things that I know now, I might not have lost the time I complained about" -en vogue
Fyi, many of my blogs stem from questions I'm asked as well as stimulating conversations. So feel free to ask any questions or suggest topics. This was a combo of both. I adamantly believe for a healthy relationship to survive, you need your guys nights out and girls night out. Literally and figuratively....both sexes need both. Time with your "other" and locker room time with the same sex. We all need to agree on that as well as two rules. First rule: Shut up, n don't ask questions! "How was it" is the only question you get, at most, and no follow up! Any synonym of "cool," "aiiigh," or even just a syllable is an acceptable answer. Second rule: cameras stay home! I've seen many on both sexes go down in a glorious ball of flames bc of this.
Why is this so important? Good question, I'm glad you asked. Well with the exception of one couple I know who been together like 16 yrs.....over half their life and they're under 30, its safe to say your "other" has spent more time in their life not with you, than with you. Now I can't speak for women but I know men are territorial. We like to walk out a room or house and walk back hours, sometimes days later finding shit exactly where we left it. We don't like our seat or controls adjusted, some men don't even like to cuddle or share space. So when we do make that transition to share our world with someone else that's a big step. Celebrate your victory and be proud of yourself. Congrats, you are a catch. Take a bow. However, PACE YOURSELF. Baby steps (in football you get penalized for encroaching or false starts....basically making a premature advancement before the appropriate time to do so).
Sidenote: now before all you women jump down my throat, hear me out to the blasted end.
Sidernote: women who understand sports will understand men better then any other woman. We equate just about everything to sports. It's not a stupid game, its an analogy of life.
Now men tend to have a lot of "junk" laying around that we don't use. News flash women! Its not junk and I cannot stress that enough. Ex. The basketball, football, baseball, toys, cleats, rifles, the mountain bike our homeboys, etc. Why? Bc we like to break into our old ways from time to time. Do the things we used to enjoy doing that made us identify with who we were and associate with manhood. Just bc we haven't done something in a few weeks/months, doesn't mean its over with. Matter of fact, find solace in the fact that we enjoy your presence so much we voluntarily forsaken so much for you....but don't assume its gone.
Sidenote: there are fewer faster ways on earth to fall out of a mans good graces than disrespecting his habits, hobbies and possessions as "junk." Action figures, comics, porn and video games (just to name a few) had a valuable place in his world well before you showed up. We don't devalue your billion stuffed aminals, dozens of shoes and infinite makeup collections. Leave us be.
Men generally don't like change to begin with, or worse, induced change. We welcome adaptation, evolution and inclusion.....not transformation. We're odd creatures. We could've been well on our way to changing, but being told to is just enough to make us change our mind back and not change a thing (even I had to re-read that a few times so I hope yall got that point). So when in a relationship for some time, in order to not fully lose who we are (you know,.............. the guy YOU fell for), men need the occasional guys night. We need to (don't lynch the messenger) scratch, curse, talk smack, use the word "bitch," say things that we know you're not supposed to, that in any other environment gets you expelled, fired or arrested, make fun of things we know we shouldn't (old ppl, midgets, republicans, etc.), laugh at ppl falling, check out girls, talk about how hot some females are, critique sports, trade grooming tips, make fun of and harass our drunken friends who throw-up or pass out on the curb, fart n burp and just let our belts loose, doing all the masculine things we used to do under the "previous administration" (or lack there of) to no scrutiny. Guys don't scrutinize one another, we just heckle and roast each other, which is welcomed bc it sharpens our wits and keeps us on our comedic toes.
In addition, here's an answer to the popular question, "you're in a relationship why do you hang out with so many single dudes?" Once you hang up your spurs its fun to live vicariously through the stories of your single cohorts. Men have this universal "TEAM" mentality, where even though you're on the bench or the skybox, you get just as excited about that game winning home run as the man who hit it. If your man is gunna cheat on you, he either will or won't. Has nothing to do with his friends. Friends may push you to go out or take one more drink, but they are not THAT influential.
Sidenote: you can always tell when a man has spent a lot of time with his female. He typically goes into the mode where she dresses him and even more obvious, his wits are dulled and his comebacks are weak, dry and slow when he is mocked and ridiculed.
Sidernote: in case you raised an eyebrow, yes I did in fact say "trade grooming tips". I lived with just about every race, ethnicity, and there are fewer procedures on earth, shy of surgery, more complicated than the black mans facial grooming ritual. So much so, that many black men will not shave themselves and only allow their barber to. This may consist of a plethora of before, during and after products/treatments/ tools. Don't believe me? Ask a well/clean shaved black man what they use and unless he's one of those anomalies who doesn't grow facial hair, I promise you they will say no less than 2 (sometimes as much as 4) separate tools or one with a billion different attachments. OR "my barber trims me up."
So next time he wants to go out (and it is unfortunate that in some instances, permission is required) just be the cool understanding chick that says "sure, go right ahead." You'll never find a guy complaining about his girl wanting to go out with her friends (unless its that stank bitch we hate that's always filling your head with doubt and suspicion.....and you're over there thinking you're man is the problem). He'll appreciate the understanding and look forward to coming home, even boast to his friends about what a great gyal he has. It can help alleviate or even prevent some of the nonsensical arguments I've discussed before. REF: PSA: "Facebook/myspace/twitter/Blackplanet ruined my relationship"
and “I don’t believe in lying…….but if I did, here’s how I would do it…” The net results: - Happier guy = happier girl - He won't feel like he has to lie to you (and in most instances, men don't lie bc they wanna do something wrong, its usually bc stifling girls give em a hard time for doing all the simple innocent stuff they've always did......when you met them) and men hate feeling like they have to ask permission to do things.
Sidenote: never understood (guys or girls) who met their "other" at a club.......and now suddenly doesn't like when they go to..............clubs.
-And finally, after spending all that time with single guys, most men will remember all the reasons why they're NOT single anymore, value, appreciate and cherish you infinitely more.
