Staying Motivated in the Gym..........Part 4a

Previously on My $0.02----------------> [Recommended reads for newcomers]

Staying Motivated in the Gym..........Part 3

Staying Motivated in the Gym.......Part 2

And in our first installment-------------> Staying Motivated in the Gym....Part 1

Carnival Epilogue...

So I had this whole wake up call recently. It's time for me to stop being a lard-ass and get cracking again. I have to revisit this topic from time to time - key word "STAYING." Fitness is a marathon, not a sprint. Fitness is a process, not an event. Fitness is a journey, not a destination. Fitness is a lifestyle, not a diet..........point taken?

Background: Post Carnival, I was a little worn out. I'm usually pretty consistent and steady paced, but I told you guys about my 90 day blitz leading up to my trip,(varying from 1-3 days in the gym a week with high weights, 6-8 rep super sets, ab workout every other day either first thing in the morning, last thing before bed) but while at carnival I partied everyday and slept probably 4 hours.....at a time....if that much (kinda hard to sleep when you get home from a party at 5, 6, 7 am and by 9, 10, 11 am ppl outside are blasting music). I also got into the habit of eating all types of fun, glorious, gluttonous-ass, self indulging...........BASICALLY what I call "lard ass" or "fat boy" foods. And you know what? After being so disciplined and regimented for nearly 2 years......................IT WAS FUUUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNN!!!!!

Sidenote: In the soca community, when speaking of Carnival, it is common practice to say the name of the city or country it is in. When someone simply says carnival, we are talking about TRINIDAD CARNIVAL!!! Note to self for all of you, put this on your life's check list: LIST OF THINGS TO DO BEFORE I DIE - TRINIDAD CARNIVAL.

Sider note: Speaking about last years carnival, I said it was, "arguably the BEST week of my life." This years carnival..................HANDS DOWN DI BESS DAMM WEEK OF MY LIFE!!! Talk about pure an unadulterated fun on top of fun with fun dressing, marinated for two days in a 12 year old aged fun, served in a creamy fun sauce with little grated fun sprinkled on it.........and a side of fun...................."and thangs"

Subsequently, I fell into the typical lard ass thinking that most of Americans have. Oh yes. You know of which I speak and are probably guilty of several counts yourself. That instant gratification lardass mentality that sounds a little like this: "I worked really hard.....I deserve a break........and a treat." So I decided, "Eh!! I think I'll take a week off of my usual routine and stray a lil from my norm." Now, normally this is okay, welcomed and a very good healthy practice. Especially if you're doing heavy free weight training.

Sidenote: Constant heavy free weight training is really bad for your tendons and joint unless you have a super perfect diet and supplement game.......which most ppl don't. It's always a good idea to scale back for 1 week every 4-8 weeks with just calesthetics, cardio, light free weights or cable machines that are easy on the joints. Almost everyone trainer I know has suffered some serious injury, who coincidentally don't take any time off and I'm praying I'm not next.

However, I decide, "let's go for broke," took it to an extreme, and went on what I called my "Fat boy binge." This was scheduled to last the Friday I got back until the following weeks Sunday (can't jus be a fatboy for 3 days now can we? Stop talking that "that's that healthy shit")..............Can I tell you, good food (rather "fun" food bc a lot of what I was eating was not good) is like CRACK!! It's SOOOOOOO GOOOD!! Once it hits your lips........... I literally had a Will Ferrell moment. Yes, that's exactly what happened to me.

So, almost 2 months later. I'm still breaking many of my rules and I've prolly been to the gym about........4 times.....not per week, cumulatively in the last 2 months. Now, to clarify and not offend the sensitiveez out there, when I say "lard ass" and "fat boy" I'm not making fun of overweight or obese ppl. That's just sophomoric and mean. I know full well there's a plethora of factors, namely genetic that determine a persons size and shape. So when I say lardass or fatboy, I mean things that are just egregiously excessive or not conducive towards a long healthy lifestyle. You don't have to be fat to be a lardass, thats moreso a personality/character thing. You don't have to be fat to be a fatboy or fatgirl, skinny and fat alike do fatboy shit from time to time. So to clarify, here are some of my activities. Any single one of em are ok and acceptable, few and far in between, once in a while.....but daily..........or worse, more than once a day can lead to calamity. And sad thing is many of us do these naively and dont realize why we aren't meeting our goals.

My fatboy/lardass tactics (completely out of context for me)

• eating food or drinking while laying down
• haven't been drinking my usual 64+ onces of water a day.....or any thing for that matter that doesn't have a ton of sugar and "red #5 " in it
• having ice cream immediately after meals
• ordering fastfood more than once a week....sometimes more than once a day
• ordering fries with my food
• eating "wings n thangs" from the local hood fried food spots (two thighs n cheese fries aka the "Raphael Extra value meal")
• eating chocolates with or immediately after meals
• three full meals in the span of 4 hours
• eating well after I'm already full
• eating big meals and going to bed or nap right after
• icecream with hot peanut butter and fudge poured on top [salivating like homer]
• Breakfast, ice cream, sushi, tai food and cereal one day (one of my favorite)
• Drinking JUICE, shakes and or soda with my meals
• and too many more to name because my inner lardass is kicking in and about to wrap this up
  

Sidenote: Anyone who knows me or has ever dined with me in the last 2 years knows that I NEVER EEEEEEEEEEEEVERRRRRRRRR drink any fluids with any of my meals, let alone juice or soda so this was a HUGE break of characer for me. Not even water. I've explained why before. Scroll down to "DRINK LOTS OF WATER" and start reading from there.

Sider note: 8 glasses of water is not as hard as ppl make it sound if you look at it as 64 ounces. The average paper cup is 8oz and the average cup/glass at home is 12-16oz. I have a 20oz measuring shaker cup so its easier to track. Try this, drink 2 cups of water (16oz) before you go to bed and I PROMISE you you'll get up in the morning.................[GIGGITY!!!]

Jim Rohn once said "The formula for failure is a few small simple errors in judgment, repeated over time. Why? Because failure doesn't show up on the first day. It would be great if it did."


Time to get back to work.

YES WE CAN.........EXPLOIT OUR PRESIDENT!!!!

I been saying since November 4th that Barack is going to stimulate this economy, one way or the other..................no sooner said, so it became.

By November 5th, I kid you not, the bootleggers were at it. I'm pretty sure anyone who takes a bus, train or lives and or works around any major metropolitan area felt the aftermath that continues to this day. While the rest of the world paraded merily through the streets, or some of us went to bed bc ppl were complaining about getting sleep......on the night our first black president was elected.....sigh.... Oh you know they were pulling an all nighter and going double time whipping those slave sweat shop laborers from the time it was announced. Oh yes, while the rest of us were popping that one bokkle of Moet you save for special occasion, zinfandels and Andre, the hustlers were hard at work. The overworked laminating machines, t-shirt screens, printing machines, and button presses have saturated every house, street and corner with Obama paraphernalia.

How does the ol' phrase go........"Let he who is without sin cast the first stone......................OUCH who hit me?"

In the subsequent 5 months and change, my father has avalanched this home with a barrage of Barack, and Obama family calendars. I have seen Sasha and Malia more than many of my own cousins. I have only fallen prey to one Barack Tshirt, but I it was hand painted acrylic, and artist to artist you gotta respect that. (I picked the one with the most visible orange, tee-hee). I ran into the artist again months later and bought 2 more....one spare and one to frame. Painters and Photoshopeez worked feverishly and laboriously to add Baracks mug into every iconic black painting made in the last 50 yrs. Accompanying the likes of Selasie, Marcus Garvey, Malcom X, Bob Marley, Martin Luther King, Mandela, GHANDI, Frederick Douglas, Lou Gossit Jr., Samuel L. Jackson, Morgan Freeman (bc those last two brothers are in everything), D.J. Cool Herc, Biggie AND TUPAC...... okay so clearly I exaggerate a tad but I shit you not on the Tupac!

Sidenote: Is it just me or is Sam Jackson or Morgan Freeman are in EVERYTHING!? Freeman is one of my favorite actors ever! Aside from being like 80 for like ......20+ years, I have yet to see him in a movie that was short of amazing. MAN can he pic a script........Jackson on the other hand........maybe something is wrong with me but for some come-found-it reason, why must the man always have some STCHUPID hairdo or wig in a movie?! Like seriously, he must ask for it in his contract. "A regular shape up??! HELL NAW MUTHAFUCKA!!! Give me grey wig, some cornrows, a jerry curl afro, or a nappy gray afro that's flaaaaaat on one side!!!!....(shout outs to BADU again. Couldnt find her version, but this is the closest I found) .........AND I HOPE THEY BURN IN HELL!!!!" Eff yall, I been making fun of Jackson waaaay before Chappelle

Sidernote: In case new readers didn't catch the sarcasm, I actually think Biggie and Tupac are two of the most overrated and over glorified entertainers ever, let alone rappers. They were really good, but in my opinion, celebrated MTV and VH1 posterchilds. I'll go toe to toe with anyone on that and dismantled your pre-packaged arguments that we've all heard a billion times on tv and magazine documentaries.

WEST SIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIDE note: Yes I know Ghandi wasn't black, but I seen him on an Obama poster and he was the shit........although I read he didn't think very highly of black ppl....

Side, Sider, Apple Cider (cus it sweet) note: DJ Cool Herc popularized the 'loop' of the "break" aka the breakdown of most rock, jazz and funk songs, a technique that lead to the creation of "Break" dancing (someone's in the back going "OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!!!"), rapping, and this whole little thing called hip hop. Hence the term "B-boys"........and "B-girls"

Sidest note......... I have noooooooo clue where the hell I was going with this....gimme a sec to scroll up.....oh ok.

OK!! Got it. Baracksploitation. The hype around this man has spawned a new industry. Here are some of my favorites:

• The Obama Brownie, handed out at the Inauguration for Volunteers.
• The "I was hear" Inauguration T-shirts or pins that were all over the capital that weekend...... that you subsequently can buy in Flatbush Brooklyn or southside detroit........sorry. BITCH! Im broke! My photo album is my souvenir.
• Obama beer.... which has been banned by the feds........in multiple instances
• Sasha and Malia dolls, which Michelle gave the official first lady "AAAW HELL NAW!!" to.
• Obama fries, an Obama Burger or Obama coffee from a shop in the East Village
• Obama beauty supplies (I shit you not, next time I pass it, this is why camera phones were made).
  
• And worse of all......"OBAMA FRIED CHICKEN" has been popping up like herpes sores all over Brooklyn and in some parts of Manhattan and Bronx. Is this happening in your cities too?

For my extra-hoodarians, hoods are littered with Arab owned fried chicken spots (affectionately known as "chicken" or "A-rab" spots - pronounced AY - RAB), typically serving everything from fried chicken, pizza, gyros, burgers to ice cream, and everything in between... basically every piece of junkfood, heart attack enducing element shy of horse tranquilizer under the sun. The true hilarity of this is that they actually have calories listed on the menu. Granted, its law now to display the calories....but lets be real, if you're counting calories, you have no business in these spots anyways. I must admit, "Wings n thangs" (as I like to call em) is one of my guilty pleasures that I indulge like once or twice a month. I'm terribly partial to the Raphael extra value meal, aka two thighs and cheese fries. It has served me well on my fat boy binges. Many of these A-Rab spots are re-naming themselves to Obama Fried Chicken. One can argue that no one complained when they started naming schools after him, but I dare someone to be naive.....stupid enough to buy that argument.

Sidenote: Wings n thangs came from a Trick Daddy video when he is in a high end restaurant and calls a hood chicken spot called "Wings n Thangs." A man in a giant chicken costume procedes to ride a bike cross town, out of the hood and into the rich restaurant and deliver him a bag of fried chicken. At the time, one of the funniest videos ever........set black ppl back damn near 15 yrs, but ignorant hood shit is one of my other guilty pleasures.

Sider note: I know there are actual "Wings n Things" in Long Island and other states, but for some reason they dont have em in bk, so its my generic name for all wing shop typologies that are not KFC or Popeyes, AKA bulletproof chicken spots, owned by A-Rabs. Thats all they have....wings.....and ....thangs....oh and salads now :)

I feel sorry for the real casualties of Obamamania. Not you or I who are fortunately here and therefore saved from the incroaching tomfoolery. I speak of the armada of children being born in the next 5 yrs who are condemned to a lifetime of going to the bottom of college, job, credit and loan application piles. WHY? BC as my friend Jenn so eloquently pointed out "...basically saying that in about 5 years Kindergarten classes are going to be filled with Obamaniesha's, Barackanita's, Obamina's, Barackita's, Obamalina's, LaBarack's..."
And don't forget "Barack-quan." In addition, I feel sorry for the teachers and employers who will have to look across the room with a straight face attempting to pronounce these names. I can go on about how some black ppl name thier children, mixing shit from two languages that dont go together, something that means "beautiful" in one language but "donkey" in another, but thats another conversation.

World famous Poet and one of the founders of the art we now call "Spoken Word" (a term I loathe bc the very act of classifying that which is not meant to be classified, self sabotaged and ultimately spawned its own inevitable demise), once said, "Of course America is the richest nation, because it was built for free." Ppl always joke about manhattan being sold for $20 but no one realizes it was "sold" by a ppl who had no concept of ownership, private property, let alone a man owning land. This country was built on the manipulation and explotation of ppl in less opportune circumstances. Exploitation is our Gross domestic product! We've exploited every ethnicity, blackies were just the last (look up the anti-Irish riots in ur free time). We don't talk about the Chinese and Japanese imprisonment and holocast-like practices in our own country, yeeeeeears after the abolition of slavery. We frowned upon rap music while record execs made millions of dollars and only giving naive young black performers pennies for every album they sold and forcing them into bankruptcy, poverty or worse. If someone wants to sell a tshirt, a bottle of beer or a box of wings with cheese fries, and can find enough ppl out there who want to buy em, then God bless America, LET THEM!! Obama's name and face are putting ppl's kids through college, long before any of his initiatives get pushed through the senate.

Just one favor? White people.............all ppl...........PLEASE STOP PAIRING BLACK PPL WITH CHICKEN AND OR MONKEYS (like the Obama sock puppet) AND OR WATERMELONS!!! Just take my word for it bc that warrants an entirely new SERIES of blogs. You can venture this on your own. Go into any black neighborhood to furhter your studies, but I assure you, your field results will be less than desirable and the learning curve, short n painful. Theres a bleeding history behind it, stop questioning it and let it be.

Closing Sidenote: This isn't me trying to be witty with some pneumonic wrtiting device. I LITERALLY talk like this. ....much to the annoyance to many phone conversors. Sidenotes and all.....only in text I get to exercise my Gollem-like obsession with the color Orange..........and coincidentally I've been told the sidenotes.......or rather "thangs," are a favorite part note to many. Thanks!! That should be a message to kids world wide. "Just hang in there and pull through and once you graduate you're A.D.D. will be celebrated!!"

Okay, alright, enough is enough note: What if I changed the title from "My $0.02" to "Blogs n Thangs"...........hmmmmmmm wuddyathink?....cus get it? The sidenotes are my sides....aka my "thangs.".......Yes? No? Maybe so?

Signs that the sky is falling #4

I WARNED YOU ABOUT THIS BEFORE!!!!

Previously on My $0.02.....................Signs that the sky is falling #1

"In the words of the ever wise, immortal Al Bundy, "slowly but surely, our freedoms are being taken away from us," as he recanted about simpler times when you can park on the street for free while he was complaining about parking meters. This is so true. Why are we so docile and supersizely, ez-passly passive?? If this happened in France, they'd storm the capital and streets and demand change. Don't be surprised when they start putting meters on our homes and start charging for air."

AAAAAAAAAND in Signs that the sky is falling #3 (no more slacking on my journalistic duties!)

we discussed how just like that, a service that was readily offered to us for free that many ppl got used to and acclimated to using for free decided to start charging all of a sudden.

Well here it is.

SIGN THAT THE SKY IS FALLING #4:
OXYGEN FOR SALE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sidenote: this blogsite is being a brat and not allowing me to upload said photo, thus making for a very awkward hole in me piece. Not a fan. GRRRRRRRR!! This makes me cranky, so I'll add the photo later. Check back.

Taken at an "oxygen bar" in Vegas. It's a "to-go" personal use "scented flavored" oxygen serving.
This time I won't do so much explanatory explaining. Let's do some simple math. I live in a universe where 1+1=2 and 1+2=3. Always has, always will. May or may not make sense, but that is how I analyze and look at all things, mathematical or not and whether or not numbers are even involved. That being said, lets look at the quote from sign #1 and the central theme of sign # tree. If 1+3=4, where do you think we will go with this in the future?

Paranoid am I? Try telling that to the ppl who missed out on the the ground level of bottled water, a now billion dollar industry, bc they thought "egh, who'll pay for water when you can get it for free out the tap or from a stream?" Or try telling that to the millions of home owners on that dreadful day when the "water company" came and put a meter on the house and started charging you every time you shower, clean food, flush the toilet or open the sink. If you think that "THEY," i.e. corporate self servers and their profiteers can't go about making you pay for something that you've enjoyed for free up to this point (hint hint AVG), I have a bridge for sale that I'd like you to take a look at. Talk to you later. I forgot that I have a ceiling to mop.

"I blame Twitter/Facebook/Myspace/Everyone bc I'm dumb!!"..........The Honorable Moron Award

A friend of mine posted this article and I couldn't stop laughing about this tomfoolery. Nor can I stop commenting on it:
Twitter gets you fired in 140 characters or less

Sidenote: I already expressed previously in My $0.02 how hesitant I am about Twitter. It was only a matter of time before the bungling buffoons would come tumbling in.

Question,................. if you were on an Internet networking site.........and you knew everyone online can read whatever you write.......and you're page is not set to private, so that includes ppl who aren't even your friend.........does this sound like an intelligent thing to post on you page......for the entire World Wide Web to read?

Sidenote: for our less tech savvy readers, "world wide web" is what "www" in your website url stand for! Stick around and someday we'll reveal what url means, http and the difference btwn http and https!!! :).....anyways....onto the quote....

"Cisco just offered me a job! Now I have to weigh the utility of a fatty paycheck against the daily commute to San Jose and hating the work.”

Now that's still not the funny part. It gets better. He gets a message from someone who works at Cisco and apparently it was an "open response." Hope that means something to you twitter ppl or rather....twitter-ers. My naive guess is that it's open for everyone to see:

"Who is the hiring manager. I’m sure they would love to know that you will hate the work. We here at Cisco are versed in the web."

How syntactically lethal? I just love the simplistic, yet sinister latency of that phrase! Just laced with an innocent candy coating of cynicism, with a creamy gooey evil nougat filling. The guy who responded should teach a class. I'd sign up for it.

Sidenote: Can't you just hear a mini Homer Simpson going off in his head saying "D'OH!!!"

It's not Twitter's fault ppl are idiots. Especially in this economy when thousands of fully qualified ppl are getting laid off for no wrong doing of their own and can't find work to save their life, you're dumbass is complaining about a commute when you know you'll be getting a "fatty check?" You tit! I have a friend that commutes from Brooklyn to Long Island 90 minutes both ways (sometimes 2 hours) and has been doing so for 6 yrs! Do what you gotta do damnit!!

Why ppl publicly post where they place work online is beyond me personally (as I've stated before), why ppl friend co-workers and bosses is a complete alien concept to me, but I can't even begin to comprehend why the hell someone would curse out or insult their place of work....ON A PUBLIC NETWORKING WEBSITE WHERE ANYONE CAN SEE?

Even before twitter, most companies had a Google search service that tracks every news article or blog that mentions the company name, let alone a technology company. They mostly do this to post in the company intranet and keep track of its media/press coverage. Reminds me of the guy who worked for the Eagles who got fired when he cursed them out on a facebook status.

http://sports.espn.go.com/nfl/news/story?id=3965039

So I guess in the new employee manuals, by Friday COB (close of business), there should be an addenda that specifies "don't curse out the hand that feeds you on public domains," bc common sense is not only not common, it's flat out a myth. And if it existed, its chillin with a stegosaurus, woolly mammoth, and dodo bird right about now...........[sigh]

Sidenote: Are Bald Head Eagles extinct? Did anyone see that Inauguration Concert for Obama (YAAAAY I WAS THERE) when they brought out the eagle? Gotta love the irony of what our nations symbol is......... the strongest, free-est bird with the widest wingspan..................who's bound by the leg and can't fly anywhere bc it's shackled to its master.....WOW...............MESSAGE!!!!!!!

Sidernote: If you haven't seen "Don't be a Menace to South Central While Drinking your Juice in the hood," its one of the Wayans Brothers finer works. Here's a compilation to better understand the context. It spoofs all the hood movies of the early 90's namely the sentimental moments and allegorical themes. Hence, the mail man blatantly pointing out every time there's a MESSAGE!!

The wisest, realest thing I ever .......... copied

I rarely to never do this, but I was reading a commentary in an article that I absolutely had to share.

Background:
You ever sign into AIM and the homepage opens in a browser with a billion little articles. I periodically start a web session with a few of these links that pique my interest. So I'm reading this article entitled: "

15 Kinds of Bad Girls...Readers' Picks" aka "Women Men Despise."

Valuable lessons for women. Brilliantly composed of articles the readers submitted. A festive read, some of em are generalized crap, many are really good, but the real gold in this mine is #13. So much so that I stopped to come and tell you all about it. I loved it so much that I decided to copy it verbatim and share with you all. Glorious lesson on life. This can be applied to both women AND men. I know quite a few guys guilty of this too......but moreso women :-p
Courtesy of:
http://www.aolhealth.com/healthy-living/relationships/bad-girlfriends-wives?icid=aimDBDL2_link4-a

She's Too Busy Looking for Mr. Perfect

So many women are looking for Mr. Perfect. Here is a story about looking for perfection. A woman was driving down the highway, and since she had been driving all day, she was hungry. She started to look for a restaurant to have dinner, but could not find a restaurant she liked. One was too big (slow service). One was too commercial (quality?). One was too out of the way. One had too many semi-trucks parked around it (country Western). One had an empty parking lot. She looked and looked until she was so hungry she decided to eat at the next restaurant she saw. She drove up, walked to the front door and saw the sign: CLOSED! The moral is that people looking for perfection seldom find it. --STEALTH694

Thank you "Stealth 694" for this golden pearl of wisdom!!!

Sidenote: "Golden" and "pearl" don't exactly make much sense does it? Nor would, perhaps, "golden gem?" No? No good? Golden marble......golden pea...bean, seed??? I think I like seed. No way am I about to call any other spherical object "golden." Yall figure that one out on your way home.

Sidernote: ".........................OOOOOOOOOOOH I get it! He meant golden "balls" eeeeeeeeew! Thats groooooooooosssssssss.

PSA: Ladies!! If you want to dance alone.........stop going to parties full of ppl....who want to dance!!

This is a phenomena that has plagued men for an age and puzzled me for just as long. Fellas, we've all been to a bar, lounge, house party, or club and experienced this at some point in our lives (unless social interaction, partying and dancing just isn't your thing...seriously, not being sarcastic....a lot of my friends and one of my brother are not party dancing ppl):

Eager and overzealous guy # 246: Hey young lady, would you like to dance?
Unenthused female at party #73: [forced smile] umm..no thank you, I'm just dancing with my friends.

I've always wondered this question........If you don't want to dance with anyone........why did you choose to come to an uber crowded establishment..........where music is playing...and ppl are going to be there dancing....and you know guys are going to want to dance with you....and dress like a cross between a lead video girl and the lead sex symbol in a James Bond film..............IF YOU DON'T WANT TO DANCE WITH ANYONE!!!!!????

This comes to mind bc I went to two events in one evening, one with a female friend home for spring break, then I got a txt from some friends who happen to be in the same area who invited me somewhere. At the latter venue, which was a post office in comparison to the first one, I was on the dance floor and did the old fashion "hey can I dance with you gesture" and a lady stopped dead in her tracks and started talking to me asking me questions "That's ok, I don't feel like dancing. hi, how are you, what is your name," clearly in a sarcastic demeaning tone. I just walked away.

Sidenote: I'm just asking for a dance, it's not that deep. If you look out your window, past the trees and way over the telephone lines, higher than the tallest building outside, you will see the flying fat baby's ASS that I give about your name and who you are? Had I wanted to know who you are, I would have asked.

Sidernote: In contrast, I actually have a number of good friends who I actually met during situation at parties, however it was always something memorable that happened, that sparked a dialog and a moment of bonding. This chick was clearly being a dick, and don't challenge me at that bc I'm quite seasoned at it.

Point of clarification: "Post office" is a term from a song by Soca artist, Bunjii Garlin and Reggae Icon Beenieman, called "Plenty Gyal." Some of you will get it on the way home or tomorrow during lunch...."post office.....mail.....sounds like male....oooooooooh!!!" Other more common terms, sausage fest, sardine can, sword fight, mailbox etc, feel free to add.

Now I'm sure ladies can come up with a trillion justifications for her reaction and I can too, but that's irrelevant in first person perception, now isn't it? The reason why I see this as imbecilic is in reference to such stark contrast to the first venue. I had to take a phone call at the first spot, so I had to leave my friend alone in a lounge (with the "vultures" hovering waiting for me to step aside from her) and and she didn't want to talk to anyone, dance or be bothered....so you wanna hear the crazy thing she did??? She sat down....in a corner....FAAAAAR AWAY FROM THE DANCE FLOOR WHERE EVERYONE ELSE WAS DANCING!! What a complex, alien concept!! NONONONOONO!!! I have a better idea. When the hot tracks come on, I'm going to dance not near, IN the middle of the dance floor, by myself, surrounded by men....bc that's the surefire way to avoid hassle and dance by myself.

Granted we all know that some guys are a little bit more "ambitious" than others, so here are some helpful ways to avoid being hassled if you don't want to be bothered

• My personal favorite....I have a great place where you can listen to the best music, dance all by yourself for as long as you like, and not be bothered at all all day long.............its called MY HOME!!
• Learn from my educated friend. Find a corner, nook or seated area that is not as easy to get to. Standing behind chairs, stools, or tables can serve as barriers or vulture retardants.
  
• Simply don't go to parties. I know many females who don't "club" for this specific reason.
• Don't be cheap. Money and peace of mind are interchangeable. I know a lot of women, who for this reason, will shell out the extra money to get in the VIP section, which usually has tables, seats and not as much hassle. You get your own section, you can go in general admission and escape to your sactuary at any time, still enjoying the atmosphere and tunes with everyone else. If you go in general admission, ESPECIALLY IF YOU GOT IN FOR FREE, you get what you pay for...fend for yourself.
  
• Utilize "the impenetrable buddy circle fortress." You know what I'm talking about. That circle of 3-7 girls just dancing and enjoying life. This deters most guys who already can anticipate "oh, I'm just dancing with my girls" a block away.

Sidenote, there are cracks, leaks and points of vulnerability in this fortress so ladies be ware........but I'll be betraying my gender were I to reveal said tactics B-)

Sidernote: If you got in for free, quit crying. Too damn spoiled!!

• This one is kind of evil, but I've admitted that I'm evil time and time again. If you don't want to be bothered, always roll with a "body guard" or "Cave Troll."
  

Sidenote:The "Cave Troll" is the.......to avoid offending any potential cave troll or cave troll enthusiasts, let's just say....that.....very....masculine-esque not so attractive friend. If we measured on a scale, and attractive was in.....Seattle......the cave troll would land somewhere around.....say, Morocco. Yall can call me evil all ya want, I just invented the terminology, not the concept. If ya wan see real evil, I can give you the names to a handful of women who actually do this and think like that......and those of you reading who know you do it are prolly laughing you're tail off.

Here's something to consider next time you cry and complain, "Oh woe is me!! Everyone wants to dance with me or talk to me!! I'm soooo pretty/hot/attractive and SUCH a good dancer!! Why am I so cursed!!? Oh pray for me!! There are some females who go out all the time WHO NEVER GET HIT ON or so much of a "HI, can we dance." I see it all the time, and I know some like this. Imagine how sad and heart breaking it is to see your friend who has her pic of the litter, turns down guys you would dream to get, get hit on left and right, approached all the time and complain about it while no one ever wants to talk to you. I consider that "a good problem to have." So if you don't like the attention, make yourself less attractive, or consider some of the humorous tactics to combat this grave burden you are cursed to carry.

Signs That the Sky is Falling #2

Previously on "My $0.02"..................Signs that the sky is falling #1

Okay. Much like egg n cheese and Vanilla Ice, "I'm on a roll!!"

SIGN THAT THE SKY IS FALLING # 2
H & R BLOCK IS LAYING PEOPLE OFF DURING TAX SEASON!!!!!

.............. I don't think I really have to dig TOOOOO deep into that one. There is something so rudimentally sad about that, that a comedic parody can not harness. A friend of mine was telling me that she and 200 other ppl got laid off recently. Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't this the season when you need MORE tax people? WOW!!!

Sidenote: Real Time with Bill Maher is one of the funniest shows on TV and I'm glad its back. He talked about something similar when he made light of that fact that a bar in Boston laid off a bartender from the classic "CHEERS" (yes the one from the tv show) the weekend BEFORE ST. PATRICKS DAY!!!.............can't make this stuff up ppl.

At times like this, I often ask myself.........."what would Tupac say?....".... Beautiful Video!!!

Sidenote: I don't reallly go about quoting the word of Tupac. It just happened to be a relevant song to the topic..... I think he's a bit overrated....okay more like highly overrated.

The UBER-est Nerdy-esque thing ever!!!

OMG!! I read this on someone's status and I had to look this up to confirm it. Today is actually "Pi" day....did ya know that?? I mean 3.1459xyzlmnopdpg's ova on da wesSIIIIIIIIIDE!!!!

........OOOOOOOOH I get it!!!..heh...heh..because it's March 14th today..heh.....and March is the "3rd" month of the year...thats right....ha...so numerically that would be 3-14!....haha......how cleverrrrrrrrrrr?!!!??? I wonder who's the pocket protector that came up this poppycock? Seriously! How many times must your milk money be stolen at lunch and your homework copied for you to say "when I grow up I'm going to make a day dedicated to the honor and glory of Pi!!!?" How many times have you had a family, school, job or medical crissis.................that was solved by the numeric medicinal prowess of PI!!!!??? I will investigate the significance of this cult-like phenomena with the number and report on my findings on a latter day.

And apparently this is the 21st year it's been celebrated too. I don't know what's more fascinating. The fact that someone came up with this holiday, the fact that there's and organization and website with shops and ideas to celebrate dedicated to it, there are hords of ppl who celebrate.....or that fact that I've never heard of this before. Hilarious!!

Sidenote/Disclaimer: We at The Rrchitect would like to apologize to all Pi and Pi day fanatics and enthusiasts who may have been offended by the comments in this expressed written brain fart. In the event of such said offense, we highly encourage that you engage in the following activities: either grow a pair, hold it the eff down or laugh it off as humorous.....which is the sole intent of the jest.

Sidernote:.....Yeah, so that was not so much of an apology. It's My $0.02 damnit! I find it funny. Laugh with me :)

ADDENDA!!!!
SOMEONE SENT ME A FRICKEN PI DAY SUPER POKE!!! LMAO!!!!!!

Signs that the sky is falling #1

If we haven't heard it enough, the economy has gone to shyte. China is talking about (emergency sidenote: why the hell did spell check want me to spell "about" with 2 t's?? "Shyte, I understand, but "aboutt?" Am I Canadian?!........no offense to my Canadians and Canadian enthusiasts) pulling its money out of the US (funny how we're a stock and China has over a trillion liquid invested in us) bc they are uncertain of the certainty of their investment..........(that don't sound too right). But I'm no financial analyst, I'm a Joe Scmoe. There are more alarming signs that our economy is down the tubes, as far as I am concerned.

Sidenote: As big a story as that may sound, I actually had to google it to get articles bc funny enough it was not on the homepage on CNN.com and when I tried looking it up in their search engine, they looked at me like they never heard of the place China. Ostrich technique is what I call it.

Sign That the Sky is Falling #1: Grocery bags now cost money!!!!!
Now this is where the alarms blare, panick is spread, evacuation announcements are made on the PA and the Godzilla theme song plays as Japanese ppl run, arms flailing, pointing and screamimg "GODZILAAAAA!!!" .......Aaaaaah, Gojira. My favorite man in a rubber n foam suit....Seriously, I digress...

Remember the days when you had a choice, "paper or plastic" and you didn't have to ask them to double your bags on the more heavy items? There was always that pleasant immigrant who couldn't work anywhere legally or that little local neighborhood kid who wasn't old enough to work anywhere else...........Dont act like I'm effed up! You go to Associates, Keyfood, Pathmark or Mets around the way and act like thats not what you see? Ah the Bag boy or Bag Lady (shout outs to Eryka Badu). THESE SUNZABISCUITS CHARGE YOU FOR THE FRICKEN GROCERY BAGS NOW!!!!!! WHAT THE HELL!!!

Sidenote: Eryka Badu is a blasted genius. I been reminiscing on how "Mamma's Gun" is one of my favorite albums of all time. I remember that she dropped a single/video for "Bag Lady" that was soooo comercial and un-Badu, AND on the album she said "get that comercial shet outta here" and she dropped the most Badu-esque version of "Bag Lady" possible!!

Sidernote: By comercial version, I mean the old "hey lets used a well known song from a well known producer so it strikes a cord in ppl's memory and its an isntant hit even before you listen to the words...." Shout out to Dre on the "Xxplosive" beat. WARNING!!! its spelled "XXplosive" for a reason!!

I firmly believe that in the heart of every tragedy is a great opportunity and new market, so before I even began to bitch n whine about it, I notice in catologs that theres a whole new market of "Grocery Bags," some of which are thermally insulated to keep your stuff cool. I remember hearing my folks try to justify buying this like they absolutely NEEDED it, so I had to remind em they collectively have lived over a century without em. The raw fish and icecream will survive the 3 block walk home. I'm sure. Paper and plastic will do just fine.

Sidenote: I absolutely loath Whole Paycheck.....uh I mean, Wholefood Warehouse or whatever the heck that starbuck grocery store is named. Perhaps thats where ppl got the idea of buying reusable bags. I want my infinite supply of plastic bags that I use as garbage bags, laundry, travel bags for shoes and a billion other around the house uses. I bet you guys who been throwing away your bags so wrecklessly will think twice and woe the days you did such careless practices!!

In the words of the ever wise, immortal Al Bundy, "slowly but surely, our freedoms are being taken away from us," as he recanted about simpler times when you can park on the street for free while he was complaining about parking meters. This is so true. Why are we so docile and supersizely, ez-passly passive?? If this happened in France, they'd storm the capital and streets and demand change. Don't be surprised when they start putting meters on our homes and start charging for air.

Sidenote: I won't even bother supplying a link. If you don't know who Al Bundy is, well you need to. Congrats! You've waisted half your life away.

Sidernote: Actually looking back at it, the Bag Lady video was quite clever. The song is great, I just love the album version so much better. If you've seen her perform live you'll understand.....and if you can count how many times you've seen her perform, then you havent seen her enough.

Point of clarification: I was MADLY in love with Badu.....we were engaged in my imagination.....until I found out that her golden locks that fell down to her calve was a wig..... I always wondered when she revealed that she was bald, did all the women who she inspired to go natural, cut perms, and lose jobs and relationships over their locks cut them off too?

TOS: Facebook owns you. Get over it. Here's how.

Recent uproar has soared through the news, Internet and all other forms of media about a recent change in Facebooks Terms of Service agreement. For those of you who don't like to be bogged down with esoteric terms and legal jargon mumbo jumbo, its that loooooooooong notice that comes up before you sign up for an online service or install software, which you are supposed to read but instead, scroll to the bottom,click "yes".....and in doing so, legally state that you actually did read it.

Useful Reading:
Uproar about FB's TOS "Facebook's terms of service (TOS) used to say that when you closed an account on their network, any rights they claimed to the original content you uploaded would expire. Not anymore."

"What does arbitration mean?"

Mark Zuckerberg's response

Now there are a number of reasons why I am not concerned, but to mention a few:

By definition, an agreement is a decision made in concert btwn 2 or more parties on a series of terms...........ok so maybe that's just my definition but I typed this on my blackberry one night btwn rem cycles when I couldnt sleep. LEMMELONE!! Facebook and sites like it are mutually beneficial. A virtual database to serve as an addressbook for every possible social network you've ever been a part of with 1 click access to 1000's of ppl?? How much would it cost you to build and maintain a website that does half of what it does? I hope Algorhythm or any other experts can chime in here. And how many different sites would you need? Example. A friend of mine writes and draws a comic strip called "Justus" . And by me promoting his facebook group, in the last few months he's gained about 400+ new subscribers who recieve his updates/subscription to new comics.

Well since we're screwed, here's how you COULD HAVE saved your privacy and moving fwd.....I say could have bc you most likely have done most if not all of the following already:

sidenote: I absolutely refused to sign up for twitter and lattitude as soon as I heard about them.

-The cliche mantra, as old as time, "READ THE FINE PRINT." I hope you finally learned this. In the information age, we are long pass the era of "ignorance is bliss"....its actually quite lethal. You can plead a lot of things in court but ignorance is not one of em.
-Learn the meaning of the term "ARBITRATION." Too much to get into on that topic but I gave you a fine article on arbitration you should read....and more importantly understand.
-If you don't want anyone to know, don't post it!!!! The people who actually need to worry about this bc they're doing the shit the govt wants to track are smart enough not to have fb accounts. You think al queda or the mob operate on fb? Don't nobody in NSA, TSA, ATF, CIA, FBI, NORAT, LMNOP or da WEST SIIIIIIIIIIIDE give a fuck about who tagged you in their spring break southbeach album.

Sidenote: I figured out years ago the only way to keep a secret....IS NOT TO TELL ANYONE! For the hard hearing, that was "ANYONE." Everyone has at least 1-5 people they can trust to tell things and won't repeat it......except to THEIR 1-5 people they can trust to tell things and won't repeat it and they may have a totally different wheel of morality and ethics than you two do, but we digress.

-Please don't link accounts. "Hey use this finder thingy to find your friends in your email address book who's on fb!" "Link it to your im or email account". Okay! GREAT IDEA.......... Let's completely forget that fb is still a complete stranger who you just willingly gave away YOUR FRICKEN EMAIL SCREENNAME AND PASSWORDS TO!??? You think they deleted it???

Sidenote: the amount of ppl who use the exact same screen name for multiple accounts, including bank and credit info is scary....exact same password, even scarier.

Sidernote: Apparently Karen Phillips likes the new format of the "sidenotes"..........but wont leave a fricken comment IN the blog

Side side sidenote: Screw spell check!! I will stand my ground and spell "sidenote" as one word. I lost respect for this bastard language after 2005 when "bootylicious" got inducted into the dictionary.

-Don't install mobile aps. Hmmmm let's think. A website that tracks data and stats and imma install its software on my mobile phone device thingy? I don't see the point, you can go on fb from your smart phones web browser anyway. Why do I need an application? Which leads to my next point.....
-Stop adding applications. Aps were cool the first few times enticingly luring me in with things I like but the agreement just kept raising my eyebrow. Your basically given additional third parties (that is a company outside of facebook) the rights to use all your fb info. This is why I don't get the outcry, this has been right in our face all this time. Read bitches!!! READ!!!

sidenote: I considered hyperlinking the "read a book" video however, although I agree with its satirical message, I do not in no way shape or form condone the use of the "n" word whatsoever.......but so far Boondocks gets my only "pass" card.

-CC INFO?? I hope to God that you did not put in your credit card info into fb so you can buy stupid "gifts" or pay for "premium" superpokes ::shakes head::
-Don't get specific. Why are you posting your physical address to a virtual?
-Leave the important stuff vague. Basically the stuff that you can't find on any public record. For example, look at my "info," always was and will be
Employer: "one of those firms"
Political position "lesser of two evils"
Religion: "trust in God, but lock your car door"
Relationship status....NOT POSTED and will never be posted ever again (talk about unneccesary drama in the ex-files)

sidenote: what the EFF is "complicated" other than a conversation starter and a reason for ppl to bother and ask "what's so complicated?" REALLY!?

sidernote: My ex-coworker Tiffany (God bless her, I heart her so) could not understand why I had all my co-workers on limited profile....

There are ppl who've know about this for years. A friend of mine Nazinimod, poet/designer, told me years ago that he won't post pics of his clothing line on myspace bc their TOS basically said the same thing that you forfeit or rather consent some ownership of anything you post to myspace. Hence why I post my blogsite LINK in my status and not the actual blog through rss feeds so it appears as notes. Blogs are copyright protected to SOME extent but posting it through the fb application absolves, basically null, void and yields that to guess who? Besides, all the comments go on fb, not here :(

sidenote: Thank you all for your continued patronage, praise and compliments but is there some technical difficulties as to why the frick you don't leave your comments HERE and not on fb, gchat, aim or txt msgs?? I'm such a comment whore (hangs head low)

In conclusion, to all you ppl who say my blogs are too long, think about how much software you've installed and downloaded that had a TOS that you just scrolled to the bottom and clicked "agree" and didn't read bc they were "too longl?" I've been installing computer software for years and all TOS say the same give or take a few articles, clauses and esoteric rhetoric. Specifically (paraphrasing):

"...you also agree that we have and or can exercise the expressed written right and or privilege to can and or will change this TOS at any given point and or time in juncture with and or without notification......and or."

I'm no lawyer, but basically that sounds like your telling me to agree to an agreement and or contract that you can change whenever and or however you feel and I have no power to fight? AND OR?? Oh yeah, I'm really going to put the coordinates to my secret volcano lair on this web site MUAH HA HA HA HA!!!!

Relax, even if there really is this big brother element that you're so deathly afraid of knowing all about you, chances are they prolly already do :)

ADDENDA!!!!

Another eyebrow raiser. FAMILY APPLICATIONS???? Why the hell are you calling out, listing and identifying all your family members on fb? We called that tattling or snitching. Don't wrap me up in third parties bc you're push button crazy!